G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero #280

Writer: Larry Hama
Pencils: Ron Joseph

Summary

An “Untold Tale”, set at the conclusion of issue 34, as Wild Weasel and the Baroness fly their damaged Rattler back to Springfield. Wild Weasel performs an emergency landing, as Cobra personnel scramble to break them out from the wreckage.

The Baroness is then immediately called away to Paris, where Cobra is trying to put the squeeze on the Borovia Prime Minister, Josef Brozowski, before an international treaty summit. Major Bludd has already been working the job for Cobra, but has his own plans as he’s been contacted by Brozowski’s rival. Bludd now plans to frame Cobra for killing Brozowski.

The Baroness figures things out and springs into action on a…scooter. Albeit one armed with a canon. She’s able to thwart Bludd’s plan and save Brozowski. In appreciation, Brozowski is now open to working with Cobra.

Notes:

• This sort of reads like one of those “1/2” issues that Hasbro produced for figure two-packs, circa 2007. It’s supposedly a standalone story, but has some strange continuity problems. Namely…
• At this point in the comics, Major Bludd had been in a Cobra dungeon, until the Baroness arranged for his release to help her assassinate Cobra Commander. It was only THE big plot in issue 33.
• Bludd was a mercenary and his loyalties could switch easily, but it seems odd that he’d be working as an operative for Cobra so quickly…after trying to assassinate their leader.
• You can No-Prize an explanation, but it’s tough. #1: a lot of time passed between issue 33 and 34. In that time, Bludd got back into the seemingly good graces of Cobra to get this Brozowski assignment. Also, the actual assassin is issue 33 was Billy (Cobra Commander’s son), so it’s not like Bludd was caught red-handed and had been exposed as a conspirator.
• It’s still a tough sell. Especially when Bludd ends the story by saying: “until we meet at the rally in Springfield”.
• After issue 33, Major Bludd was forgotten and was not seen, again, until issue 104. A story that took place in Borovia..so there could be some connection to this issue. As it is, this is a LOT of explanation to justify this rather sub-par story.
• Bludd uses a Cobra Stinger and the story makes use of the vehicle’s missile rack, for once.
• Bludd also recites some of his trademark bad poetry: “when you’re riding in a Stinger and you have an itchy finger, do not sneeze or twitch, for this’ll ….prematurely launch a missile”.
• And still MORE continuity problems. Techo-Vipers and Vipers appear. In the actual timeline, both of those troops didn’t appear for a few more years. The Vipers circa issue 50 and the Techno-Vipers circa issue 80. Again, sloppy editing or research.
• This one is (maybe?) a bit easier to explain: we simply hadn’t seen the Techno-Vipers “in the field” until much later, but they’d been there all along. The Viper uniforms were first used or tested overseas, before being integrated into stateside Cobra.
• The Vipers are implied to be “legion etrangere”, former members of the French Foreign Legion. If you’ll recall, the original 1982/83 file cards of the Cobra Troopers and Officers mentioned that they were pulled from all over the world.
• Wild Weasel is seen without his helmet completely off. I think this is the only time we’ve seen his full head.

Appearances

Characters (figures): Baroness, Destro, Major Bludd, Wid Weasel

Characters (“comic only”): Josef Brozowski

Vehicles and stuff (toys): Cobra Stinger, Cobra Rattler

Vehicles and stuff (“comic only”): Cobra Armored Car/APC, Baroness’s scooter

Firsties: Josef Brozowski, Cobra Armored Car/APC

Rating: 2 Flag Points