Doom Patrol and Suicide Squad Special #1 (1988)

Coicendentally, also the cover to “Greatest Suicide Squad vs Doom Patrol Stories Ever Told” TPB

“Red Pawn”
Writers: John Ostrander and Paul Kupperberg

Pencils: Erik Larsen

It’s another crappy..errrr, collectible… FIRST ISSUE! Sure, this is only a one-shot special issue and you may think I’m bending the rules a bit. Dammit, I’m Willy Wonka and this is MY freakin’ chocolate factory, so you can just tongue-kiss my poo-hole, mister! It’s still a #1 FIRST ISSUE!

Doom Patrol and Suicide Squad were both mild hits for DC in 1987 and 1986, respectively. A new Doom Patrol title had been teased for years, mostly in the “Teen Titans” family. They finally got their own book which was a slight re-packaging of the 70’s “New Doom Patrol”, with Cliff Steele (Robotman), Tempest, Celsius and Negative Woman. They added a few rookies, but those characters thankfully aren’t included in this story. Like I said, the book was a mild success, but I think part of it was due to penciler Steve Lightle and his fairly hot renditions of Celsius (Arani Caulder) in a skintight body suit. At least, to my 13-year old self, that was a reason.

Suicide Squad was a pretty cool concept for the time. Digging up old 60’s relic Rick Flag (no relation to Randall Flagg or General Flagg) from the original team, he spear-headed a crew of incarcerated super-villains forced into working for the US government’s Task Force X as “good guys” or even super-powered hitmen. It also introduced one of DC’s more significant characters from the 80’s: tough-as-nails, bad ass broad Amanda Waller was their boss. Typically, it seemed one villain was killed in the line of duty each issue. Most of them were useless or out-dated characters, so you could think of it as Captain America’s Scourge storyline having its own title. The concept is very similar to the current (2011) version of Marvel’s Thunderbolts (although the original concept of Thunderbolts was slightly different, but I’m splitting hairs).

As a lenghty prose piece in the back of this issue tells us, the writers of both titles were pals and decided to crossover their two books. A lot of details are included, but in the end this info is really only interesting to the creative team themselves. So instead of splitting their story into two issues, we have this special, double-sized, no ads book. It’s not too bad of a deal, since the cover price checks in at $1.50. I think regular DC Comics were priced at $1.00 around this time, so they actually saved each one of their fans 50 cents.

The story revolves around right-wing hero Hawk; he of “Teen Titans” and “Hawk and Dove” fame; trying to deliver armaments to Nicaragua. The plot was sorta’ pulled from headlines of the period, as Hawk’s out to help the Contras (eventual stars of their own Nintendo game) in their ongoing fight against the Sandinistas, a group with Communists ties. But his airplane gets shot down and Hawk is held captive by the “Commies”. Around this time, Hawk was often used as a Pro-USA “warhawk” of sorts, or comic relief. He pulls off both of those roles in this story.

Hawk’s capture is all over the international news, so both the US and Soviet governments move to solve the situation. Waller sends in the Suicide Squad to either rescue or kill Hawk, on orders of no less than President Ronald Reagan, with his weird ski-slope hair and complexion that looks like a bowl of oatmeal:

Two Pentagon officers named simply “Matt” and “Jack” want to grab some glory away from Waller’s Task Force X and con Doom Patrol members Valentine Vostok, Negative Woman, into the same mission. To add to the fun, no less than Michail Gorbachev makes an appearance to back the Sandinistas by sending in the Rocket Red Brigade. There’s also the matter of a mysterious Russian Special Operative named “Comrade Stalnoivolk” and his creepy boss who eventually make their way to Nicaragua. I’m not sue what Stalnoivolk’s deal is, but his boss kinda’ looks like Judge Doom from “Who Framed Rooger Rabbit?” Basically, we’ve got a 4-way race to grab Hawk.

Of course, fisticuffs follow as all four teams make it down south. It’s like an episode of Itchy and Scratchy, as all they do is “fight and fight! FIGHT-FIGHT-FIGHT! FIGHT-FIGHT-FIGHT! The Itchy and Scratchy showwwww!”

Rick Flag’s crew is certainly a grouping of losers, as he has Psi, The Weasel (not Bobby Heenan), The Thinker and Mr. 104. Not a great list, as only The Thinker had any significant history, but hadn’t done much since the late 60’s. Thinker is killed by Weasel early on, but his helmet takes over Rick Flag’s mind. Weasel’s your basic feral charcter, as all he does is run around and talk about “eating flesh”. Eventually, the possessed Flag uses Thinker’s helmet to kill the Weasel (Kwinn the Eskimo would be proud).

Mr. 104 is strange one. He can change into any element on the periodic table and appeared in “Teen Titans Spotlight”. That issue is referenced here and only makes me say: “whoa, somebody read that title?!” Weird name, too, as I guess “Mr. Periodic Table of the Elements” just didn’t have that zing. Yes, there are now about 118 elements on the table, but we can assume that there were only 104 officially listed when “Mr. 104” debutted.

Psi is an early 80’s Supergirl foe, who runs around in a metal bikini, cape, and looks like a rogue He-Man villain.

As was par for the course, all the villains are eventually killed when the Rocket Red Brigade shows up. Psi remembers her past, just as she dies in the arms of Negative Woman. The point in emphaszed as we’re given MOOD LIGHTING for her death panels. That’s all fine, but I thought I remembered Psi showing up in 2004’s “Identity Crisis” in the Calculator’s satellite, no worse for wear. You can check that for me– there’s not enough beer in the keg to get me to read that pile of dung again. But since she’s a mentalist, I suppose you could whip up some wacky theory about how “her consciousness drifted astray for years, until it found a new host body”. Same for Thinker.

Despite the big 3-Way-Dance between the Squad, Patrol and the Brigade, that fourth factor of Comrade Stalnoivolk is the only one who actually reaches Hawk. Stally’s like a Russian Superman, as he appears to have super strength and invulnerability. Clad in a simple trench coat, he walks into the cell where Hawk’s captive, easily breaks through the wall, then FLINGS Hawk into the night in a pretty funny scene.

The Doom Patrol and Suicide Squad agree to work together to beat up the Rocket Reds. When that’s done, they meet up with Hawk and leave the country. All sides are upset with each other over all the death and destruction. An included epilogue shows us the fallout of the mission for both Rick Flag and “Judge Doom”. Flag’s just upset with all the death, but Doom shoots and kills a Russian official as part of his own political agenda. I’m not sure what happened to ol’ “Doom” and Stalnoivolk– I’m guessing their story was eventually included in “Firestorm” or “Suicide Squad”.

Nowadays, DC writers like to include artistic or philosophical references to try to make their books appear “smart”. In the 80’s, they tried this by using “international politics”. This is just a plain ol’ slugfest with a “political” backdrop. While I give the writers credit for including an actual “real world” country (not “Qurac” or some other convenient fictional spot), it wears thin that it’s nothing more than nearly 50 pages of punching and shooting. That’s the trade-off you have to make with a comic book, though– for every “mature” plot you craft, you have to back it up with the usual superhero antics.

Summary: POLITICAL INTRIGUE, lame supervillain deaths, Ronald Reagan and lots of fighting! Which…pretty much sums up the 80’s.
Cover Price:1.50
Rating: .50