G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero #305
Writer: Larry Hama | Pencils: Chris Mooneyham
Summary:
In Springfield, Cobra Commander discovers the remains that of the 3 Enhanced Blue Mutant Ninjas that blew up while facing Dawn Moreno. Over in the Moreno household, itself, Crimson Guard Fred-23 knocks on the door to see if their hiding anything. The elder Morenos beat the tar out of Fred 23 and tell Dawn to quietly sneak out of town; they won’t turn her in.
At the Pit, the hand of the Blue Ninja Parts (acquired last issue by Black Hat’s crew) comes alive, but Stalker blows it away. On the surface quonset huts, Spirit, Multo and Lady Jaye easily take out the other 3 Blue Ninjas that were sneaking around there.
At the Baton Rouge Revanche plant, a Python spy sent by Serpentor Khan and Dr. Mindbender is revealed. On Cobra Island, Serpentor Khan and Dr. Mindbender have also been watching the meeting of Destro and “Zartan” in Scotland. “Zartan” is revealed to be a fake, as it appears that Destro and the Baroness might be privy to this. To be thorough, Serpentor Khan and Dr. Mindbender launch a missile at the real Zartan, who is cruising through a swamp on his Chameleon.
Notes:
- Hey, ya’ like guys standing around and looking at big viewscreens? Then G.I. Joe is the book for you!
- Multo gets a “bad-*ss” moment, as he slices off an Enhanced Mutant Blue Ninja’s hand to get a grenade pin.
- Again, we’ve been hearing about how the Blue Ninjas have been “upgraded”…but they’re still killed rather easily
- Serpentor Khan and Dr. Mindbender are aware of everything and says that it’s all “going to plan”.
- I’m not sure, but I think this is the first time we’ve seen Zartan on his Chameleon Swamp Skiier since…maybe his first appearance?
- Destro says to “Zartan” during a toast: “slainte mhath sassenach”…which is apparently a Gaelic/Scottish toast for good health. “Zartan” isn’t sure what it means. Entirely possible that Desto would’ve expected the real Zartan to know it, which is why he may be on to the ruse. Destro always seems to be a step ahead of Cobra’s plans; especially since over the past 12 years or so.
- Yeah…I’m way behind on recapping this, but my enthusiasm has sputtered. It just feels like things have been droning on and on with no end in sight. I’ve had Low Morale with doing these, before, so I’ll stick with tradition and keep at it. Who knows? I might even read something I like!
Characters (figures): Duke, Airtight, Stalker, Spirit Iron-Knife, Lady Jaye, Cobra Commander, Dr. Mindbender, Destro, Baroness, Zartan
Characters (comic-only): Multo, Black Hat, Serpentor Khan, Dawn Moreno, Oscar Moreno, Elena Moreno, Alpha-001, Black Hat
Vehicles & Stuff (toys): Chameleon Swap Skiier
Vehicles & Stuff (not toys): none
Firsties: none
Glad you’re still doing this because I enjoy reading them but yeah, it’s pretty rough reading ARAH these days. I am grateful it’s still going though because mediocre ARAH is better than none at all.
I feel it’s been a slog ever since the return with IDW.
In contrast, the first 100 issues, or so, with Marvel are probably the best comics I’ve ever read. In fact, those issues are the only reason I have any interest in the current series.
You’re not wrong! 🙂
Since the IDW relaunch (when was that…2011?) it has been mostly a slog. There were some highlights, such as: circa issue 195-199, the two-issue rescue mission with Airborne, the Stalker “Secret Origin”, and a small handful of others. The Sherlock stuff started with a lot of momentum and intrigue, but quickly fizzled.
Following GI Joe (ARAH) in 2024 is like listening to your favorite 80’s band. In my case: Iron Maiden, whom I also began following in 1982. They’re still putting out new stuff, but you’ve probably only added about 3 or 4 of the “new” songs to their “Greatest Hits” playlist. When you go to their concerts, you expect to hear the old 80’s stuff; not something that came out in the past 24 years. You still want to hear “The Trooper” or “2 Minutes to Midnight” and not “Empire of the Clouds” or “Rainmaker”. Without the 80’s nostalgia, there’s nothing to really sink your teeth into.
Before discovering your site, I read most of the IDW run for free, digitally, through my library. There were a few storylines that I liked such as the death of Dr. Burkhart. Also some one shots. One of Stalker dealing with PTSD and another of Baroness dealing with a sniper.
It’s so bad now that I don’t think I’ll ever read another issue, even if it’s free, unless you give it a glowing review. For now, I’ll just read your reviews and laugh to myself over the current ridiculousness (i.e., blue ninjas and zombies).
Speaking of ninjas, I remember reading an interview in the early 2000s where someone asked Larry about the possibility of him continuing ARAH, and he said he’d be willing to do it with one condition: “No more ninjas!” I guess he changed his mind about that.
That’s really odd that he’d say that because I’ve read other interviews where he states the ninja stuff is his favourite part of G.I. Joe. And in all honestly that’s been the driving force in ARAH the last several years. Personally I wish he’d stick with “No more ninja!”
If he’s saying it’s his favorite part of GI Joe, it could be what he thinks everyone wants to hear. He probably thinks everyone wants him to tell ninja stories. Or maybe he changed his mind. Who knows.
The interview was from around the time of Devil’s Due Declassified, which I thought was a fantastic series. And, if memory serves, there were no ninja stories in those comics.